Dating muslim man problems
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Only with their spouses, or those who are rightfully theirs, do they have sexual relations; they are not to be blamed. Thus, a 'date' for Muslims is transformed into a Halal date. Shefford Lane Dakota, KY 40242-6462, USA E-mail: Website: Dating is getting to know each other. There is the universal recollection of approaching Riyadh and witnessing the donning of the black abayas and face veils by the fashionably dressed Saudi women. My Big Fat Muslim Wedding After all that Halal sin, finally, a proposal. When they have friends of the opposite sex, they are almost always non-Muslims. You agree that we have no liability for any damages. Sometimes, though, the betrothal may break up, but, because the couple was engaged in halal dating, no disgrace attaches to them.
What am I to do when they judge me before they even got to know me? How can I help him with this? I think that the Islam is for me, but my boyfriend and I agreed that we concentrate on this when our problem — accepting of his parents of us - is solved. I want my relation with Allah to be pure and not being influenced by other things; A boyfriend can not be the reason why I should accept the Islam in my life, can it? Am I to blame when I accept the islam — and keep on believing in Allah as I do now- to make things easyer for us, because the parents want that. Is this the will of Allah? Please give us advise on what to do. How can we make them understand that they cannot judge before they even know me? And do you have any advise for him, is't going to be a very difficult dicision. Praise be to Allaah. We ask Allaah to guide you and to show you the right path, for He is Able to do that. Firstly: We thank you for submitting your question to this Islamic website, which indicates that you have trust and are keen to find out the correct answer. Secondly: A number of the things that you find strange, as mentioned in your question, are regarded by us Muslims as normal, whereas others find them objectionable. The reason is well known among the Muslims: the attitude of worldview of the Muslim is based on full submission to the rulings of Allaah and His Messenger peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him , and total obedience to Allaah, the Creator, the Provider, the Giver of life and death, because He has enjoined that upon us, and He knows best what is right for us. If it were not for the intimacy you are seeking from one another, the nice treatment you are giving to one another would not have taken place. Also if there is the firm intention and resolve to get married in the future and have children who will grow up as Muslims, that still does not justify this forbidden relationship which involves many things that are forbidden in Islam. The Islamic marriage contract is not something difficult or complicated, rather it is very easy. There is no society that is more distinguished by its strong family ties than the Muslim societies. Islam enjoins children to show respect to their parents, as non-Muslims who do not enjoy such a relationship realize. Because the mother tends to be gentle, loving and compassionate towards her children, and the father tends be to strict and take a rational and unemotional approach towards things, many children find it easier to talk to their mothers than to their fathers, especially with regard to emotional problems. But that does not mean that it is difficult for Muslims to talk to their fathers. But some people may have been brought up in a way that was not entirely right, which may have affected some of their behaviour and attitudes, but only in a general sense. The Muslim is supposed to love his fellow-Muslim who is a stranger, so what about one who is close to him — what about sons and fathers? Each of them should care about the interests of the other and love that which is best for him. Rather any father — and especially in a Muslim society — wants the best life for his son, and because the father has greater experience of life and has lived longer, and he knows how things are, he does not want his son to do something reckless which he may later regret. The father will try to keep his son away from everything that may be labeled a failure, so he does not want him to embark on something risky such as this marriage, because marriage in Islam is a strong relationship which does not just last for a limited time like the forbidden love of boyfriends and girlfriends; rather it is a relationship between the two spouses which should be ongoing and stable. So the choice of a marriage partner should only be made after much serious consideration and consultation with those who know more about life than we do. Naturally the difference of religion will be a cause of division between spouses, or will cause problems in the future, especially when children come along. We have heard of many such problems on this site. Yes, Islam does not forbid a Muslim man to marry a chaste Christian or Jewish woman; Islam allows that, but it does not encourage it. Our Prophet peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him urged us to choose a wife who is righteous, religiously committed and has a good attitude. Hence the fact that his parents have rejected this marriage was not a hasty judgement, rather it was because they know how things are. Fourthly: You ask, Will there by any blame on me if I accept Islam — outwardly — and continue to believe in Allaah as I do now? The answer is that this is a serious matter. Our pure monotheistic religion cannot be toyed with, or used for personal motives. Verily, the Right Path has become distinct from the wrong path. So learn about the religion of Islam, for no other reason than to find out the truth and to get out of the vicious circle of confusing ideas and beliefs that go against sound nature and reason. Then — if you strive hard — you will come to know the clear truth and the light of certain faith, and the matter of marriage will become easy for you — if Allaah wills. There is nothing wrong with your marriage to this man being a reason for you finding out about Islam. But if you take this first step, it is better and more appropriate than getting married and then thinking about Islam. If the family consists of two Muslim spouses from the outset, then Allaah will bless it and care for it, and they will be the basis of a family that is beloved to Allaah, because it is Muslim. If you tell them that you have entered Islam, then the One Who is more important than anyone else will be pleased with that, namely Allaah, may He be exalted. If you please Allaah, no matter whom you anger among your family, He will be pleased with you and will cause people to be pleased with you. It may be appropriate — but you need to think about this and choose the right time— for you to visit his mother yourself, without your boyfriend being with you, so you can tell her that you are keen to enter Islam and repent from this forbidden relationship, and marry her son according to the laws of Allaah. As we have mentioned above, Islam allows marriage to chaste non-Muslim women, so why not start to live a chaste and pure life, far away from any relationship that goes against that? Your saying that your boyfriend cannot be the reason why you accept Islam is true in a sense, in that you will become Muslim not for love of this person but for love of the truth and love of Allaah Who has chosen Islam as the religion for mankind. The evidence for this is clear and does not need a strong emotional motive, because the evidence and proof of the truth is sufficient. This is a good sign. Ask Allaah to guide you to the path of truth and to open your eyes to the light. May Allaah guide you to the straight path. And Allaah knows best. For more information please see questions no.
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